Author Archives: allangilmour

Larger than reality

      My goodness, Mr Midnight. Are you feeling alright? Your tail is all bushy and puffed up.

      I just had the fright of my life Sir W.

There I was, minding my own business, when suddenly from out of the blue, this great big ferocious doggy came around the corner and started snapping its teeth at me.

It was a horrible experience. I know doggies do not always have manners and themselves under control,  but what a way to carry on.

The poor dog has no style.

What could I do apart from trying to intimidate it with my puffy tail?

      And did it work? You know, making yourself larger than you are?

      No.

The poor wretched thing was just not interested. It only wanted my skin and fur.

Still, I`ve calmed down now. My tail looks normal again doesn´t it?

      Usually, the tactic of making oneself appear much larger than reality is a useful ploy.

Perhaps it was a foreign doggy and didn´t understand your body language.

      Well, I`ve never seen him before and I don´t particularly want to see him again. Anyway, I thought doggies also had instincts like us pussy cats.

      Perhaps he’s been living too long with his human owner or something. He may have lost some of his instincts by having soaked up too many negative energies.

Poor doggy. I’m sure he didn´t mean to upset you.

      Forgive and forget eh, Sir Winston.  That’s a cunning move.

      It’s not only us cats that sometimes make ourselves appear larger than we are. Perhaps humans have been observing us cats because while watching the box with moving pictures in the living room with daddy,  I’ve noticed that a lot of human beings also appear to want to make themselves larger than they are.

      In what way Sir W.?

      Through their daily actions and their rhetoric.

Haven’t you noticed how some people appear to go through life with inflated egos? The modern world appears to be living life well over its means.

I suppose people make themselves larger than they are because they are frightened of not being seen and left out.

      But it must be tiring trying to be somebody who one isn’t. It’s a bit fake, isn’t it?

Thank goodness I do not have to pretend I’m someone who I’m not. Us cats like a stress-free life.

      If it wasn’t so serious, I actually find those world politicians on the telly quite comical and amusing. They all want to be taken seriously and wish to show the world how great they are but in fact, most of them appear a lot smaller to me than they wish to portray themselves.  They appear to have no idea of how they ruin the planet. Greed and power are seemingly, the most important factors. There are so many empty words and fake promises.

      I’m thankful that many people can obviously, still see through all of the deceit, Sir Winston. All is not lost.

Inflated egos never got anyone anywhere.

      Should we have a spot of lunch Mr Midnight? All this deliberating about being larger than real has given me an appetite.

      Perhaps daddy has got some of my favourite cat sticks hidden somewhere. Eating a cat-stick would put my mind at rest.

Let’s go and have a look, should we?

(C) Copyright MAGS 2019

Climate change and cat worries

      Sir Winston, why do you think our green kingdom outside has now turned to brown with a yellow hue?  Our green patch never used to look like that?

Have the humans been up to something again?

      I was thinking the same the other day Mr Midnight.  Our garden looks a terrible state. The air angels have been using their hot rays this year to make it a very warm summer. I like the warmth of the air angels beating down on my fur but at the same time, I know it´s not very good for our garden.

      I suspect that the whole thing is a natural phenomenon. Our planet is evolving and changing all the time.

      It still doesn´t look good though does it?

      I thought the humans had been tampering again. You know what the poor dears are like. They are always damaging things. I know they don´t mean to, but they still keep carrying on with their habitual destructive attitudes.

You would have thought that they´d be a lot wiser wouldn´t you. After all, they have got larger brains than us pussycats.

Only yesterday, one of them nearly mowed me down as they were driving their smelly machine way to fast through our kingdom.

      Human beings need to always be on the move Mr Midnight. I believe the very thought of not being mobile scares the poor dears to death.

It is a shame they can´t stay in one place occasionally.  They would at least be able to help genuinely save their environment and they would also have more time in which to delve into their mental states with which to sort out some of their problems.

      Humans appear to be masters at evading their problems.

Still, the humans invented their smelly moving machines which is more than can be said for us cats.  We´re not as clever as the humans at building smelly, moving machinery.

      But I don´t think cats are supposed to drive motor vehicles Mr Midnight. We are supposed to stay put in our territories. That is why we have no interest in building such contraptions.

      You could be right there Sir W.

It´s still a bit frightening though, you know, about how nature and human lifestyles have helped create such worldwide, climate chaos.

      I don´t think we cats can do very much about the problems our world is suffering Mr Midnight. Sadly, we have to leave that job up to the human race.

      There doesn´t appear to be much hope then does there? Speaking as a cat, I don´t really want to rely on the human´s to sort out our world chaos.

Humans tend to learn either when things are too late or when they happen to be suffering.  Their comfortable attitudes seem to get in the way of humans seeing reality.

      It looks like we will have to grin and bear it then Mr Midnight. The air angels may send some water soon with which to help recuperate our once, so green kingdom.

I’m not going to give up on the humans. I`m sure a few wise ones are roaming the planet still Mr Midnight.

Autumn is knocking at the door so we may have a chance yet.

      Well, let Autumn in quickly Sir W. I`m not too fond of all this dryness in our neck of the woods.

Copyright  (C) MAGS 2019

 

Don´t give up – purrseeVier!

       If you budge over a bit Sir Winston, I may be able to get a paw on it.  It´s wedged somehow underneath the steps to the house.

       It´s no good moaning at me Mr Midnight. I´ve been trying to get the thing out for what seems like ages.

       Purrhaps you mistakingly, pushed it further underneath the steps. Now it´s completely wedged between the wall and those heavy bricks. Oh dear.

I`m not going to give up though.

I will purrseeVier!

       PurrseeVier?  Whatever are you going on about Mr Midnight?

       You know, I will keep on trying until I can get my paws onto the ball thing.

       But why purrseeVier?  Vier is the German number for the number four.

       Don´t you write it like that Sir Winston?  I`m a German cat and I thought purrseeVier was written with a ‘Vier’ at the end of the word.

       Your mincing your words again, like some of the people do in our neck of the woods.

       I don´t like mince Sir W.

       I know it´s fashionable to mix words up these days but I meant that you are mixing your words. One does not write the word ‘persevere’ with a ‘Vier’ at the end.

       Who is ‘Percy Vier’? I know it´s not a typical German name but I  thought that there were only three cats called Percy living in our street, not four.

       Oh Mr Midnight, You´re getting confused. I was talking about ‘Persevere’

       Percy Fear?  I don´t know him.

       I think we´d better leave things as they are for now Mr Midnight. The whole situation about trying to get this ball out from underneath the steps and the hot sun beating down on my fur reminds me it´s time for my little 14 hour nap now.

You can keep persevering all you like. If you´re lucky, you may even meet Percy Fear.

       Will do, Sir Winston. Perseverance helps form character and I love meeting new characters.

See you later!

 

(C) Copyright 2019 MAGS

 

Would you support us and vote for our little book ?

      Sir Winston and myself, daddy included, would be very thankful if you would click on our book and vote for us in the Reader’s Choice Awards.

      You can still behave like us cats. You don`t have to do very much.  We love taking our time.  🙂

 

 

Simply click on the link daddy inserted into this posting.

Scroll down a bit to the category

Vote for Your Favorite General Fiction Book!

(It´s on page 13 of 16)

Our little book is listed 4th from the bottom of the list.

You then click on our book and verify who you are by using your Facebook account or whatever.

      You have to verify yourself to stop people cheating and so that the kind people at TCK Publishing know that you are not a robot, whatever one of those is.

Here is the link:-  https://www.tckpublishing.com/2019-readers-choice-voting-page/

      We both hope you don’t mind helping us. Your support would be really appreciated.

This posting is not in our typical style so we will be posting something ‘proper’ within the next two weeks.

Thank you for your time.

      See you in a couple of weeks (we hope).   🙂

Purr purr and a big meow!

 

The night twinklers

It was a late, warm summer evening and Mr Midnight and Sir Winston had both meandered over to their favourite spot in the corner of the garden. They sat in front of the garden shed and enjoyed the warm air gently stroking their fur.

It´s not bad for this time of year is it, Sir Winston?

Can you smell the warm air angels tickling your nose Mr Midnight?  They are especially active upon nights such as these. Yes, it´s a great night tonight.

Mr Midnight looked up towards the dark sky and then suddenly moved his back right leg to have a little wash.

Who do you think puts the twinklers on Sir W?

The twinklers?

Yes, the twinklers. They switch them on every night, but sometimes they are not as bright as they are tonight.

I suppose the humans sometimes attempt to save their electricity; but not tonight!

Do you mean the shiny, illuminating things in the sky?

What else could I be talking about Sir Winston?

Well, humans have lots of twinklers all over the place. They even have their twinklers sometimes working when it isn´t even dark.

I believe English-speaking humans call twinklers stars. I`m not sure how they work though. Perhaps they switch them on and off with their invisible cables or something.

Well, the twinklers, or stars if you please, do look very nice.

I didn´t think that humans were any good at creating such beauty. The beauty on our planet often appears to get torn into tatters by their misdoings.

Still, you live and learn.

I do not think that they are human twinklers in the sky Mr Midnight.

I thought so. The twinklers up in the sky are way too pretty.

They are natural twinklers. They just like to come out at night to say hello. I love observing them.

The other twinklers, or should I say, blobs of light, must be the human-made type of light. I´ve heard that humans have a problem with their twinklers because they cause so much light pollution. The natural twinklers up in the sky can not shine as bright when the humans turn on all their blobs of light.

Pollution. I`ve heard that word before. It´s such a dirty word. I hope we don´t have too much pollution in our neck of the woods.

I believe that light pollution is more of a problem in large towns and cities. Our little village appears to be quite safe, at least that´s what I think.

There´s a lot of the blobs of light shining along the path where the smelly vehicles drive at night but at least we do not have any advertising boards in our kingdom.

I really don´t know why the humans have to light up the whole planet every night. Speaking as a cat, I don´t find it necessary but there again, I´ve got good eyesight!

Perhaps the humans don´t want to look at the natural twinklers so they decide to blend them out with their light sources.

Oh well, everyone seems to do what they want to do anyway these days Sir Winston. Even us cats!   🙂

(C) Copyright MAGS 2019

 

“A Helping Paw”

“A Helping Paw” by Allan Gilmour

” . . . a truly inspiring story . . .”

Tredition UK “Book of the Month” May 2019

 

      Aren´t you both a little excited about your new venture lads? Look at the video:-

       To tell you the truth daddy, I´m as frightened as hell about the very prospect of it all, especially because my paw appears on the cover. I don´t know why we started such a thing.

       I just hope the poor people still like us after they have read our little book. We cats are not used to writing books.

       I´m sure everything will be alright, after all, our new book is not much different than our blog.

       So why did we do it?  If it´s not much different than our crazy blog then there doesn´t appear to be much reason for producing such a thing.

      I wish you both wouldn´t keep referring to our new book as “a thing”.

I`m sure somebody out there loves pussycats and will be interested to learn a little bit more about themselves. We only released the book 6 weeks ago and it is has already become a UK “Book of the Month” May 2019. I was just as surprised as you two. That gave us a buzz didn´t it?  The publisher has even written a nice review of our work. Here is the link:-

https://tredition.co.uk/book-of-the-month-uk/book-of-the-month-may-2019/

 

       I just hope we haven´t gone over the top on this project daddy. You know we cats like to keep a low profile.

       Purrrhaps nobody is really interested and we can keep our low profile.

      Which would have been a waste of time now wouldn´t it?

Try to embrace the challenge. I have faith in what we do.

       Well, although I´m a little uneasy about it all, I´m still rather curious to find out what happens. Perhaps somebody will like what we wrote.

       Curiosity killed the cat, as they say Sir Winston.  Still, I’m game if you are all game.

Let me show you the cover, Sir Winston, and then I can get some household duties done.

Here we are:- “A Helping Paw”

Available on all major book websites; for e.g. Amazon.com, Amazon.co.uk or wherever your favourite bookstore may be.  🙂

 

And here is another promotional video:

 

It would be nice if some of you nice people out there would like to buy our book about our latest adventures.

We will hopefully see you next month.  Bye bye, purr purr and a large meow for now.  🙂

 

(C) Copyright MAGS 2019

 

 

A curious cat

Sir Winston and Mr Midnight were in the cellar, waiting patiently for their evening meal. Sir Winston thought he would use the time to have a small wash while Mr Midnight stared at the rows of cat food tins and pouches aligned neatly on the shelf opposite.

May I interrupt you for a moment Sir Winston?  I have a small question which you may be able to answer.

Sir Winston was in the middle of his evening wash but he stopped just to say;

Fire away Mr M. I`m just finishing the last final strokes to my early evening care program.

It was playing on my mind, but do you think our food grows in those strange flimsy, slippery things daddy opens when he serves us our food?

There´s also the long, twiggy food he gives us as a snack.  That also seems to be carefully protected in shiny, slippery, unedible stuff.  I`m not sure if it grows on those big, graceful things, like in the garden, but I do know that the heavy, shiny things do not grow in our green kingdom. Daddy said that the heavy food containers are produced by humans.  I think he called them tins.

Listen! He´s coming down the stairs to feed us.  What a great sign!  I will ask him before we wolf our food down our necks.

Hello daddy, and purrr purrr.

Good evening Mr Midnight. Are you alright?  You usually trip me up, wrapping yourself around my legs when I arrive at this time in the evening.

Before Sir Winston and I commence our evening banquet, I was curious to know what our food containers were made from. I don´t mean the things Sir Winston said were called tins. Do the other containers grow in a green kingdom somewhere foreign, because they look strange to me?

You mean the cat food pouches?

They are also man-made, especially for you cats.

So, Mr Midnight was right when he said those pouch things appeared to be a little strange.

I know you cats are fussy sometimes, but does it really matter? The food tastes alright doesn´t it?

I try and vary your diet as best I can.

Oh yes, we love the stuff you dish up. We were just curious to know that´s all.

I once read that cat food pouches, just the same as toothpaste tubes, although we won´t talk about toothpaste just now,  are made from a thin layer of aluminium and a substance we call plastic.

What´s aluminium?

And what is plastic?

Aluminium is a light metal and is one of the commonist metals in the Earth`s crust.

So, it is a natural product?

In a way, yes it is. It is mined from Bauxite and is a man-made natural product. We like to make things out of it, such as part of your cat-food pouch.

And Bauxite?

Bauxite is a stone, so it´s a natural product.

And the plastic stuff? What about that?

Plastic is a synthetic material and is man-made.

Do women make it as well?

I´m sure they do Sir Winston.

Plastic, and its byproducts, are harming our environment. We use way too much of the stuff and most of us humans take plastic for granted. I suspect we rely on it so much because of convenience – it is relatively cheap and light in weight. However, some of us humans are now coming to terms with the problems associated with plastic.

My food doesn´t seem so appetising now daddy. It´s wrapped up in stone stuff and strange synthetics.

It won´t harm you, I´m sure. That´s why I try as best I can to vary your diet.

Well, my tummy´s rumbling so aluminium layers, synthetic stuff or not, I would like you to dish out the “mains” now daddy.

Thank goodness I forget stuff so quickly. You´re right Sir Winston, let´s eat and be merry!

(C) Copyright MAGS 2019