Mr M. and Sir W. discover some funny cat sayings

      I don’t think we should be doing this, Mr Midnight. It was foolish of daddy to leave his computer switched on when he left the house this morning.

      Don’t worry about it, Sir Winston. He won’t find out. He’ll be gone for ages, which gives us a lot of time to use the thing. Especially because it’s not really constructed for cat paws.

      The internet is a great source for information, but won’t he notice we’ve been using it because of the cookies?

      As you well know, Sir Winston, I only like the cat sauce in those shiny metal tins daddy produces once a night and as for cookies – well, they’re a little bit difficult to digest for my sensitive stomach. I’m not eating any cookies, Sir Winston.

Look, here’s a quote from a Christopher Hitchens who is an author. It reads;

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are God. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are God”

      Mr Hitchens must be a very wise guy, Mr Midnight.

      And here’s another great piece of advice for humans from a Bill Dana.

“I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days.”

      This internet thingummabob is quite good, isn’t it?  I never realised that there was so much wise stuff out there.

      You’ve just got to know where to look, Sir Winston.

How about this great saying; “Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.”

A Mary Bly said that.

      She must be a very observant person.

Can I have a go Mr Midnight? Perhaps I can find something of interest.

      Sure, just move your paws around the keyboard thingy and try not to hit two keys at the same time. It’s not easy with paws.

      Mr Stephen Baker wrote, “Cat’s hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear and out the other”.

Great stuff.

Here’s another; “If cats could talk, they wouldn’t”. Nan Porter was obviously, also very wise.

      May I have one last look Sir Winston?

Look at this one from Arthur Bridges, it’s fantastic; “A cat isn’t fussy – just so long as you remember he likes his milk in the shallow, rose-patterned saucer and his fish on the blue plate. From which he will take it, and eat it off the floor.”

This guy, Arthur Bridges must also have been a very wise man but obviously, not very good at building bridges. What’s the point of building half a bridge? You couldn’t get to the other side, could you?

      You shouldn’t drop your “h”‘s when speaking the English language Mr Midnight. Every cat knows that.

I think it’s time to go and look for our pretty patterned saucer to see if it has got any milk in it.

Come on, let’s go.  🙂

 

Copyright MAGS 2020.

 

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