Food, Glorious Food

MM-Avatar       It seems alright to me Sir Winston. It´s the same delicious taste as always.

SW-Avatar       Exactly.  It always tastes good doesn´t it.  Intensive, full of aromatic odours and rich in colour; and  that appears to be the problem – humans have faffed about with it.

MM-Avatar       But it´s so tasty.  In my opinion, they´ve done a good job this time.

SW-Avatar       And what about nutrition?  What about your health?

MM-Avatar       I´m not with you Sir Winston. If you don´t eat, you´ll die.

SW-Avatar       And if you eat what the humans “dish-up”  you´ll probably die a death worse than death itself.

Listen,  I can hear daddy coming.  I´ll ask him what he thinks.

author-Avatar       Hello boys.  Haven´t you finished yet?  That´s most unusual. I bet you´ve both been talking with your mouths full or you´ve  been playing  with your food again.

MM-Avatar       Well according to Sir Winston; you can talk.  🙂  Apparently,  humans are always playing about with  food.

SW-Avatar       I was scrutinizing some of your magazines the other day and I managed to understand part of an article about human food consumption. I was just informing Mr Midnight about how much our food has been tampered and  messed about with.

author-Avatar       Oh, I see.  Yes, sadly, modern  humans  tend to have  little respect for “clean” foods – money being a prime motivator for our bad habits.    Most of us have to eat the “garbage” which is served.

MM-Avatar       But it tastes alright to me daddy.  Isn´t it as good as it´s made out to be?

author-Avatar       Just as Sir Winston was saying, if being critical, most  food items sold at supermarkets today are  not really fit for human consumption – at least not in large quantities.  There are possibilities  to find “clean” food but a consumers life is made terribly difficult because of the stance of the food industry, their lobbies and through weak Governments.

SW-Avatar       Why´s that?

author-Avatar       Because it´s not  really in the interests of food corporations and Governments to look after their clients/citizens.  Societies addictions for worshipping money are usually in the foreground of many day to day operations.  As long as the majority remain conveniently unaware of the “trash”  which  lands on their dinner plates,  the above mentioned institutions will always get away with their activities.

MM-Avatar       But the packaging is very colourful – having pretty pictures adorning the box.  🙂

SW-Avatar       . . . . . and nice words are used; such as “natural”, “organic” or “no artificial colouring” or “flavours”.

author-Avatar       Which makes you want to buy the product doesn´t it. Advertising is very powerful.  Just tell the consumer what they wish to hear and the majority will go out and buy it.

So many food-stuffs are “contaminated” with chemicals (such as pesticides or antibiotics), are Gen manipulated or contain artificial additives.

Even the August edition of “National Geographic” claims that the average American eats 22.7 teaspoons of sugar each day (without dipping into the sugar bowl).  A lot of  sugar remains hidden in convenience foods and because “convenience” appears to be the sign-of-the-times, many people will eventually get sick.   Europeans will have a similar sugar consumption rate as the Americans.

MM-Avatar       Which leads to  W 8 problems.  🙂

author-Avatar       W 8 problems?

SW-Avatar       He means “Weight problems”.  He´s trying to be cool again.

author-Avatar       Weight problems will obviously,  be one of the “after-effects” of having lived an unconcious lifestyle. All sorts of health matters can occur.

SW-Avatar       But humans may need to consume so much sweetness  because their lives are not “sweet” enough.  Continual, unhealthy eating habits could stem from thoughts  of believing that one is “victim” to society.  Surrounding oneself with “sweetness” would be a logical consequence.

author-Avatar       There could be some truth in what you´re saying Sir Winston.

MM-Avatar       So why do the majority of us cats manage to stay flexible and nice and slim?

author-Avatar       I would have thought because when you´re not sleeping, you´re always on the move.  Most humans do not  move very much – at least not on their own accord.  Some sort of  transportation method other than our own two feet  must usually be at hand. Modern humans tend to be  very unflexible – both in their movements and in their flexibility and adaption towards change.

I suppose it´s a modern, human thing.

SW-Avatar       But you humans should be careful what you eat.  Your food is not the same as it was.  You may have more selection than in times past, but human  eating habits are nearly as bad as Mr Midnights.  He wolfs his food down without even managing to savour the taste. From what I´ve heard from “Wild Cat” down the road, humans tend to slumber on the sofa  infront of the telly and  at the same time,  shovel  food down their necks.  It´s no wonder you need to take a tablet for indigestion if you don´t allow your bodies to eat and digest properly.

You´re not cats you know.  Humans should eat together sat at a table  and not hunched over a bowl infront of the telly.

Cats eat sitting crouched over a bowl – humans shouldn´t have to do that.

Still, the individual knows best.

MM-Avatar        Purrhaps humans think that they´re animals like us.  They want to copy what we do.  🙂

I think I´ll get back to my meal now.  It´s a pity there´s no side-salad with it.  I like radishes and things – but only if they haven´t received any human additives.  🙂

Bon Appetite !

Copyright (C)  mags 2013

Remove wrapper before inserting !


(Mr Midnight deliberating  what to do next).


                It was a sunday morning, a little after 11, and after having had my sunday jog,  freshened up  and finished my breakfast, the three of us, Mr Midnight to my left and Sir Winston to my right, now sat on the sofa  so that I could read the  sunday newspaper.   It wasn´t always easy reading the paper because the boys often liked to wash themselves when I had the newspaper spread-out on my lap.  When washing themselves, especially their  hind legs, their other leg  would often stick out at a 35 degree angle and frequently get entangled with the  newspaper.  One could say that the acrobatics required when  reading such a large newspaper with two cats balanced on either side were sometimes, quite a remarkable feat.


author-Avatar       The news is the same as always Sir Winston.  You know, the usual stuff – customarily negative.

SW-Avatar       Why´d you read it then? You could save a pretty penny and buy some better cat food.  Mr Midnight would be most grateful.

author-Avatar       I keep reading it because one day,  I hope to be  positively surprised.

MM-Avatar      It looks like your going to have to wait a long time then.   🙂

author-Avatar       You´re  probably right there Mr Midnight.

Look at this article. It says that the European Union in Brussels has decided to “clear-up”  roundabouts on European roads by making it illegal to place sculptures, flowers, or any other object, upon them; thus making motoring safer for motorists.

MM-Avatar       I´m not so keen on brussels because they cause chaos  with my system.

author-Avatar       I think I know what you mean Mr Midnight. Most things connected with Brussels these days seem to play havoc with “the system”.

Some of the things politicians  get up to, eh!. 🙂

MM-Avatar      A motorist is a person who steers one of those smelly, loud moving things aren´t they?

author-Avatar      That´s correct Mr Midnight.

MM-Avatar      So that includes you doesn´t it?   Do you get dazzled by all the decorations adorning  roundabouts when you take the smelly moving thing to your fur repair shop?

SW-Avatar      Daddy owns a hair salon Mr Midnight. It´s not called a fur repair shop.

author-Avatar      It doesn´t matter Sir Winston. I understood what he meant, and no, I do not get confused by decorations on roundabouts.  We even have one in our village. Here´s a picture:-

roundabout picture BLOG

MM-Avatar      Wow, it´s got a large pussy cat standing in the centre of it.  That´s cool.

Why do some humans have problems negotiating  roundabouts just because  large cats stand in the centre of them?  Are people  frightened of large cats?

author-Avatar      Actually, the animal in the centre of the roundabout is  a bear Mr Midnight.

MM-Avatar      Here´s a piece of advice for the people who live in our village.

Listen to my words:   The bear´s  not real you know – it won´t  harm you. You can go safely around the roundabout because the bear won´t jump out at you.   🙂

SW-Avatar      I think plans to  remove  pleasant objects from roundabouts, especially  animal sculptures,  have more to do with the fact that people may otherwise,  feel intimidated when driving around  roundabouts with bear´s appearing much larger than themselves.  People aren´t fond of  feeling small – especially when they feel small because of an animal. People believe that animals are lower than humans on the evolutionary path.

author-Avatar      I don´t think you´re quite right on that one  Sir Winston.

I believe the reason for  banishing objects from roundabouts  has more to do with  people  obviously being easily distracted from watching where they are driving.  Their  distractions  may cause them to  crash their vehicle.

MM-Avatar      That´s  rather stupid isn´t it?  I thought that  humans were supposed to be intelligent creatures. One must be pretty  doolally  if unable to negotiate a beautifully decorated roundabout  without creating an accident.

SW-Avatar       I think that roundabouts should look pretty instead of being sterile.

Why do humans seem to love practicality and require so many rules and regulations?

Do they not think for themselves?

And why do humans have difficulty in taking responsibility for their actions?

We cats are fully aware of our responsibilities.

author-Avatar      I guess  it´s because of our upbringing. Humans tend to forget things very easily and most of us are trapped within the confines of our societies.

We  seem to have also  forgotten the importance of living in the moment and the fact that what ever people and society wish to make  us believe, we are all  individuals. Modern society has created artificial structures with many finding it difficult to get through life.  On top of  all this,  and through convenient habit,  many have now  become  used to avoiding self-responsibility and would  sooner  play the role of victim of society than to use their own intellect, search  for their own solutions and  take responsibility for their actions.

MM-Avatar      Poor people. You´ve definitely got yourselves in a state.

SW-Avatar       And I suppose it doesn´t help that although many of you wish to live in freedom, most of you are also afraid to live in freedom – because true freedom also brings responsibilites.

author-Avatar      That´s a possibility  Sir Winston.

It´s much easier to  complain about another not having  done their job properly than for us to get up, and do something about the situation ourselves.

MM-Avatar      So humans  love  being told what to do?

author-Avatar      To a certain extent,  I think we do.

For example, the instructions on a frozen pizza box will often inform us to avoid placing  the pizza with its packaging in the oven.  In my opinion,  a classic example for absurdity and the bleeding obvious.

MM-Avatar      You can say that again.  One must be pretty pyscho if you´re an adult and still don´t  understand that plastic packaging can make you poorly.  If things are as bad as that, then you shouldn´t even  be allowed anywhere near the oven.  You could burn down  the house!

SW-Avatar      Perhaps people have switched their thinking caps off because of becoming too reliant upon modern  gadgetry and the people who  govern their countries.  That would explain why some need very obvious messages with which to get through life.   I don´t  wish to tread on anybody´s feet but through my observations, many human beings seem to sadly, now possess dormant brains.

MM-Avatar      You sometimes look as though your brains  dormant Sir Winston when you meditate in the hedge. I saw you the other day – you looked quite “spaced-out”.

Oh yes daddy, didn´t you know – we cats love to meditate because it calms us down and keeps all channels open to the universe.  That way, we do not need any further intel because we live with our instinct.

Modern humans  live their lives in artificial environments but animals are not artificial. We are totally switched on.

You humans often confuse our meditations with cat-napping, or believing that we are asleep but most of the time, we are just plugged into the W.U.N. – The Wide Universe Net.  We don´t need any incense sticks, bells or special sitting positions.  We just meditate where it takes our fancy – in the hedge, on the doormat or behind the garden shed. The main thing is that we are not easily disturbed.  We don´t like being disturbed.

SW-Avatar      I tried sitting in the “Lotus-position” not so long ago, just like some of you humans do, and I nearly damaged my back and ruptured my delicate area.  “The lotus position” is very  uncomfortable  for us cats. That´s why you´ll never see a cat sitting in the “Lotus position”.

You humans have the W.W.W. (World Wide Web) – but that just seems to confuse most of you and inadvertently, wear you all out.

Why don´t some of you take more time to discover your  connection to the universe?  You wouldn´t need silly writing on pizza boxes if you did.  Meditation helps close out your artificial world.

author-Avatar      Don´t be too harsh on us humans boys.  Afterall, we´re only human you know. We learn very slowly and are obviously  born to make mistakes.

SW-Avatar       No,  you are not born to make mistakes – you choose that experience.  If it helps you to develop  then it´s a good experience,  however difficult the task may seem at the time.

MM-Avatar       And that´s  alright with us. You all do what you want – most of you usually do anyway.    😉

Eventually, the human race may also stumble upon  the true meaning(s) of  life.  Until then, carry on with your “goings-off”.    🙂

(C) mags 2013